“Yoga May Also Be This” – from “Peripheral Prose”

Sitting with ourselves.
Within our Self.
The mind of our mind.
What is this that provokes the Gods?
This moment that I’m in.
I color myself worthy.
A sacred part of an otherwise unholy trip.
Subliminal misgivings.
Anecdotal to say the least.
We’re on the same page here for a moment.
And for that I’m truly grateful.

I sit, yet within, I’m screaming.
And if I scream loudly enough, maybe someone will hear me.
Maybe it’ll have more impact, maybe not.
Cause maybe no man knows, perhaps no man cares.
And therein lies this puzzle.
Navigating this labyrinth I built alone is enough for more than one life.
And so we sit.

And appreciate the nuance of a life lived, as this moment beckons me.
But what man is bold enough to traverse this path, I ask?
Even the most courageous among us stumbles.
And so I sit.

Sitting in this silence.
Negotiating.
Trying to unravel these serenades of mind.
I remain grateful, when I find myself not at bay,
when I’m feeling confident in the moment,
when the threats subside,
when momentum is within me.
In these moments, you speak loudest to me,
and I acknowledge there’s a truth much bigger than my own.
And then the music plays, and you scream even louder.

I sit in this silence, bravely.
Anticipating another moment to challenge my own reality.
“patience son”.
“balance son”.
Repeating in my head.
And so I sit, and wait.
And breath, and pray.
Experiencing each new moment, in me, through me, with me.
My very own Magnum Opus unfolding.
Oh how this silence can deafen.

So while I sit, I’m grateful for…
this warmth in the air
this cold in my mouth
this thought in my mind
that sound in the distance
these moments of clarity
my wife and her commitment
my family, their love and their indifference to the distance between us
my friends, and the laughs and joy we share
my tribe and the food we create and serve
my truth, and keeping it real, always, and under all circumstances
my team

in nomine Patris et fillii et Spiritus Sancti…

and I’m grateful for…
the freedom to pursue my own destiny
the opportunity to affect others
a chance to make my own living
my health and knowing the fine line with which I walk
my intuition and insight
my connection with nature
the look in my cats eyes, the smile on my dogs face
the pain that wreaks havoc on my body but keeps me present
the music that inspires me
this appetite for knowledge
this thirst for truth
the humility to embrace humility
the opportunity to be the best version of myself
the ability to make amends when I fail

And so I sit, in this silence, and in all of its beauty, I will wait.